I have discovered that I have a need for organization that must be satisfied, but it can be satisfied, and then I can't do much organizing after that. When I was in my 20s & 30s I had mostly ‘dead end’ jobs, work that didn’t need any creativity or problem-solving (which I like), & perhaps … Continue reading Organizational Token Bank is Empty
Category: Therapy Diary
Three A.M. Catastrophizing & BPD
I recently read a fascinating blog post called 'Why do we wake around 3am and dwell on our fears and shortcomings?' The author, Greg Murray, mentions 'barbed-wire thinking,' meaning thoughts you get caught up in. He describes why your thinking at 3 a.m. tends to be so problematic. This section really grabbed my attention: "we also … Continue reading Three A.M. Catastrophizing & BPD
Therapy Diary, August 28, 2021
One of the greatest benefits of therapy for me is being able to see my disordered thinking & reactions not as shameful failure, but as traces of old coping patterns that might, with gentle care, be untangled. I knew a guy years ago who had been in a car wreck as a teen and had … Continue reading Therapy Diary, August 28, 2021
Anxiety & Catastrophic Thinking – Therapy Diary, March 4, 2021
No therapy this week, but I had a bad night last night, and thought I would jot down a few notes. We have always had cats, since before we got married, but the six-month-old brother & sister pair who showed up on our porch 15 months ago are unusual in how loving they are. The … Continue reading Anxiety & Catastrophic Thinking – Therapy Diary, March 4, 2021
Insert Pithy Title Here: Therapy Diary, Feb. 18-27, 2021
Last week's therapy session was very intense. I wanted to write about it that very evening, but I worked late, and by the time we finished supper I was too tired to write. I also felt that I had to write something impressive for my friend L, and since I couldn't picture what I'd write … Continue reading Insert Pithy Title Here: Therapy Diary, Feb. 18-27, 2021
Negative Benefits; One-Way Portals; Everything is Transitory: Therapy Diary, Feb. 11-13
I don't think I've ever asked for advice on the blog before, but I could use some this week. If you can help me understand what this mood/mode/mental state is that I've been locked in for a month, I'd appreciate your insight. -=- This week's therapy session was as chaotic as most of them have … Continue reading Negative Benefits; One-Way Portals; Everything is Transitory: Therapy Diary, Feb. 11-13
The Second Arrow: Therapy Diary, Sept. 4-10, 2020
The Two Monks and the Girl Once upon a time, there were two monks traveling through a forest. In the morning they came across a river in flood. There was a young woman standing at the ford, unable to cross, as she was too small to brave the rushing river. The older monk asked if … Continue reading The Second Arrow: Therapy Diary, Sept. 4-10, 2020
Therapy Diary for May 31, 2020
Okay. So. I usually try to write coherent articles for this blog, but I can’t find much coherence in my mind today. But I also know that writing my thoughts out often helps me understand them better, and settles some of the internal chaos, so I’m just going to write. I usually hope that people … Continue reading Therapy Diary for May 31, 2020
Validation, Perception, Interpretation, Binary Thinking, and the Weedy Garden
I've been wanting to write a new blog post for a few weeks, but haven't been able to find a 'hook' that will let me get started. My writing output is intermittent because I generally only write when I get angry, or have had an insight of some sort. Even then, I have to get … Continue reading Validation, Perception, Interpretation, Binary Thinking, and the Weedy Garden
Patience, Juggling, and Other People: Therapy Diary for October 30, 2019
It has been nearly a week since my last therapy session. It was a particularly enlightening session, and I had so much to write about, but a combination of being busy and a reluctance (manifested in procrastination) to actually sit down and write has led me to this frustrating situation where I've forgotten most of … Continue reading Patience, Juggling, and Other People: Therapy Diary for October 30, 2019